'This tea might be a bit weak,' says Andy, hovering (not literally, you understand unless his Dalek pretensions are starting to manifest themselves, heaven forfend) over the teapot.
'Why's that?' says I.
'I forgot to add the tea,' says Andy.
'So,' I say, 'what you have just made is, basically, a pot of hot water.'
'Yes,' says Andy.
It has been an odd week. We both feel a bit weary, but not for any bad reason. Oh well, you know, it's the end of a Winter that seems to have dragged on and on. The house sale has failed, so we are off the market now because we are fed up and want a break until we get renewed wind in our sails. I have been having 'crap teacher' moments.
On paper, this week promised to be rip-roaringly good fun. On Tuesday we were due to go to a TV recording of a new comedy quiz show starring Jo Brand. Heather was coming with us (she cancelled Zumba especially) and off we went, all eager-beaver like, only to get to the studio and discover that the tickets had been over issued in order to make sure there would be a full audience, and even though we arrived in plenty of time, the studio was already packed so we were turned away with the promise of priority tickets for the next TV recording.
There was nothing else to do than stop off on the way home for ice-cream and play a game of 'What Would Be The Worst TV Programme We Could Be Offered Tickets For?' (Answer - Jim Davidson UKIP Comedy Night.)
Yesterday, one of the lads I tutor stopped me as I left school.
'Miss!' he shouted across the playground in a way that wasn't embarrassing in the slightest. 'I got the result of my latest English assessment. I got one mark off a C grade.'
'Oh crumbs,' I said. 'How annoying. One mark off a C.' I put on my disappointed face.
The lad looked at me. 'No, Miss,' he said. 'I got a top D. I've never had such a high grade in my life.'
'So you're pleased...?'
'Yeah!' he said, a big grin on his face. 'Thanks, Miss.'
And off he went, probably for a spliff or some other dodgy substance.
I walked home feeling a little humbled. It's all about perception of value, isn't it? He missed the magic C that us teachers are directed by government to extract from every student BUT he was proud of his D. The best he had ever got. He had, in his eyes, succeeded.
And as I was walking through the town I bumped into three students from the school I left at Christmas. They ran after me to catch me up.
'Please come back,' they said. 'We miss you.'
I thought they would have forgotten me by now, because children are often fickle like that. But they hadn't.
And this evening Andy and I were due to go to an evening of Gilbert and Sullivan Musical Extravaganza. Half an hour before we were due to leave for the theatre, we got a text. Due to cast illness, the show had been cancelled. The God of Going Out appears to be not on our side. But actually, I've got a bit of backache as I've been doing a lot of walking this week so sitting in a cramped seat wouldn't have been the best thing, and Andy spent 3 hours operating on a dog this afternoon, so he is feeling very tired. Companionable evening in, then, being droopy and middle-aged.
I got an email from this tutoring business I should have started with nearly 2 months ago but is having trouble getting enrolments. They have offered me two hours on a Sunday. I start this weekend. I don't know what to do about that one. Back in October it had sounded so positive and exciting. Now it seems very disappointing. Perceptions, you see.
Yet the school I am tutoring in now, well, it's going very well. I am enjoying it, I have been given more hours to do, the work is varied, the students are great. There are whispers it could carry on in September.
And then I got an email from my old Year 13s. They'd had their exam results. They wanted me to know that they were the best results in the entire 6th form. They wanted to thank me, because apparently it was me that made them succeed. I am now a snivelling wreck because I thought I'd let them down by leaving them before they had completed their course.
I guess, as Spring appears, that I should take a fresh look at my tired old perceptions of how things should be and how they actually are.
Such a weird week.