Renovations Day Two Hundred and Twelve

The tiles are on the bathroom wall. Except for the tiles that we ran out of (black floral on whit - I told you I was no good at maths) and that I've had to order more of which hopefully are being delivered tomorrow because I paid extra for delivery so they bloomin' well better had or there will be trouble.

The sanitary-ware that was in the hall is now in the bathroom, but piled in a corner of the bathroom and not in situ in a usable sort of way.

The cooker is still looming large in the kitchen awaiting installation on Wednesday. The wall against which it will sit was stripped bare of its faux wood covering yesterday by Andy and his crowbar friend. The old cooker was dragged kicking and screaming into the middle of the kitchen and the surrounding underneaths, tops, bottoms and sides cleaned by me and Mr Cillit Muscle Bang so Matt the Gas Fitter doesn't think that a complete slattern runs the kitchen.

The resulting bared wall - lumpy and bumpy with ominous looking wires sticking out hither and thither- has been measured and assessed for tiles. More tiles. Which will cause more tile angst for me today.

The three drawers to the right of the old cooker have been demolished to make space for the range. Which means new homes to be found for their contents. Which meant the larder cupboard needed sorting out. And the three drawers on the other side of the cooker. I am looking at the walls and ceilings. I am thinking - 'Let's hang stuff from the walls and ceiling. Let's get a pan hanger.' I am looking at the kitchen ceiling and thinking, 'I need to repaint that ceiling.'

Pandora Kitten vomited up the stairs yesterday. Or possibly down the stairs. I'm not sure which way she was facing at the time. Anyway, there's a distinct possibility some intense carpet cleaning might need to take place soon.

The school is still refusing to change my tax code because they still say they haven't received confirmation from the Inland Revenue. The Inland Revenue say they have sent confirmation twice. I am stuck in the middle being a bit tearful about the double incompetence of it all.

There are ten more pages to edit for the Much Malarkey Manor Christmas Hen Diaries 2011. They have to be done TODAY so we can get a printing discount from Lulu.

I've done the ironing.

I've got a bit of a funny tummy.

It's raining in a not very nice way.

And if anyone asks me at school tomorrow if I've wasted another ten hours of my weekend writing pointless lesson plans that I don't even look at when I'm teaching, then I am very likely to a) scream b) laugh hysterically or c) throw a pretend faint in the hope of being sent home.

Then I'll have time to paint the kitchen ceiling.