Saturday 3 September 2011

School's In!

Word Verification of the Day - 'subleab' - the level below 'leab'.

Well, it's proper Autumnal here. Lots of mist being burned off by the sun to reveal heatwave. Not this morning of course, because it's Saturday, I'm at home, and there are three lots of washing on the line attempting to dry. (And talking of washing - can you hear that? No? Well, that is the new washing machine, all plumbed in and doing its washing-machine thing. It's a hummer, not a shouter. A calmer, not a frazzler. We like the new washing machine.)

But the last two days, because I've been back to work, have been incredibly hot and gorgeous and summery. Never mind - it's only nine thirty. Plenty of time for heatwave to return and sizzle the pants.

I love the beginning of the new school year. So full of bright-eyed enthusiasm and shiny-faced optimism. And new stationery. And visions of well-ordered classrooms filled with eager, hard-working and smiley students all determined to get those A grades and set themselves up for a fulfilling career.

And then you arrive at Reception.

A new state-of-the-art super-duper-fast-as-you-like computer system has been installed at the cost of a decent-sized 3-bedroom semi in this neck of the woods. According to the IT staff it has high-res bibble snigwitz, a rapid boil acme wizit pog-bit, 1000 Gandodz of mikklegram and a hoofpot. Well, that's what I understood from the IT briefing, anyway. Apparently, this means that we will receive e-mail before it's been sent, we can access the Interwebbly before it's connected and we can store enough shoes in the hard-drive to last Imelda Marcos and all her little goblins three hundred years and then some.

Pity it has 'issues' and doesn't work. And that the English Department appears to be in a 'transmission bubble' which means the only thing the new laptops are worth using for are propping open the store cupboard whilst you arrange your text books.

The builders have been in, too. They have taken down walls and rebuilt them in different places. They have removed doors and put them in different places. They have added switches which, when pressed, appear to do nothing. They have put up new signs which are luminous green and therefore offensive to mine eye. But good for navigation in a power-cut I suppose.

Little pockets of dissent are starting to develop hither and thither because someone has got a new filing cabinet, someone has got someone else's nice class from last year and they've got a horrid class in return which seems VERY unfair, and some one has lost a door and a bit of a wall from their classroom thus making it 'open-plan' (a favourite academy trick to cram as many students in a class as possible) and they want their door 'n' wall back NOW! Preferably with a lock to keep the students out.

And me? Well, you remember when I had my photo taken for my new school badge, and I got caught by surprise with wild hair and a pink face? Well, the photo makes me look like a complete crazy woman who's escaped from a sauna through a thick hedge whilst running from a wolf/ bear/ Mrs Slocombe on an off day. Luckily, I have managed to twist the lanyard so the photo face inwards against my tummy, rather than outwards towards the world.

Ah, it's good to be back!

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