Saturday 10 March 2012

Never Quite the Same

When things are never quite the same...

1) lavender bags after you've accidentally put them through a cycle in the washing machine

2) books when you read them on a Kindle

3) teen pop idols when you see them live in concert 30 years later

4) bosoms after you've had children

5) ditto bladders

6) ditto sleep

7) home-made cakes when you use margarine instead of butter

8) newspapers when they 'newly improve' them and hike the price by 5p a cover

9) Evenings and weekends when you are now on Day 70 of 'No TV For Me.'

That's ten weeks! Cor! Occasionally I glance at the TV guide to see if I am missing anything, but I've not experienced a sinking heart as yet. A friend asked the other day if I had tried the new chocolate Philadelphia cheese spread.
'They're making chocolate Philadelphia cheese spread?' I said.
'Yes,' she replied, 'haven't you seen the adverts?'

Well, of course, I hadn't. They wouldn't have worked anyway because I don't even like the original Philadelphia cheese spread. There's something icky-sicky about it which should never happen with cheese.

Went shopping today to get Kayleigh's birthday present. She's going to be 2 on Wednesday. I can't believe how quickly the time has flown since she was born. Spent the rest of the day trying to think of an original business opportunity, because I am feeling like being my own boss.

Mrs Slocombe is no help. So far she has suggested:

a) Camel Hiking with Tea - One Hump or Two

b) The Knitted Shrew and Gannet Company - unusual soft toys for unusual children

c) Pig Cheeses

d) Wash 'n' Go Lavender Bags

e) The Honey Trap - she was quite excited about this until I pointed out that a honey trap was actually a frame on which bees built honeycomb so she suggested...

f) Honey Combs - for bees to keep their hair tidy

At this point I told her to go away as she was being unhelpful, to wit she said I'd regret rejecting her ideas especially the pig cheese one as no-one had cornered the market for home produced pig cheese and I said there was probably a very good reason for that.

Anyway, more thinking this evening, maybe even some proper planning with pencil and paper. I suspect the planning will amount to little more than a page full of my usual random 'doodles-whilst-I'm-thinking' i.e rainbows, sunshines with faces, triangles, umbrellas, bees, flowers, bubbles, balloons and spiders dangling off webs.

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