Chicken Run - the Saga Continues

Andy returned from BSAVA Congress last night vowing to lose weight and get fit.
'There was this hill in Birmingham, ' he said, 'that I had to walk up every day to get to the exhibition centre and it almost killed me every time.'
'Never mind that,' I said, 'what freebies did you get from the trade stands?'

When Andy went to congress 2 years ago, he brought back 53 biros, 2 catnip toys and a USB stick. Now it seems that freebies have become more inventive. This time, he brought back 3 biros, some highlighter pens, some multi-coloured post-it notes, 2 USB sticks, 5 bright pink thermometers and a tiny toy kitten. And three ever lasting shopping bags. 10/10 for variety.

Andy now has two days of holiday. Having recently joined the gym, he has decided that on days he doesn't go to the gym, he is going to start using the Wii Fit board again. 'Might as well,' I say. 'There's nothing on the telly in the evenings. And we can resume our battle of the champions on the penguin slide game.'

So this morning, we buy a big stock of batteries for the Wii Fit and then go to Wickes and clean them out of willow trellis in order to build the 'corridor' part of the new hen run.

Now, the hens have taken a very positive fancy to their new play area. They spend a lot of time at the top end of the garden, perched on their new bench, or wrestling cabbage from its string on the remains of the shrub I couldn't get out of the ground. They scratch all the bark chippings into a big pile into the middle of the play area, then they kick the pile out flat again. A bit like Sisyphus pushing his boulder up the mountain, but it keeps them entertained.

'Should I get a sledge hammer?' says Andy, in the manner of someone who really wants his own sledgehammer. 'Or should I stand in the garden banging the posts in with my ineffectual rubber mallet, looking pathetic until our neighbour offers us use of his sledgehammer again?'
We discuss whether we'll have further use for our own sledgehammer and decide that it will be useful when constructing the polytunnel (if it ever arrives - don't talk to me about the polytunnel. The money has been taken from my credit card, but there is no sign of the goods. I have e-mailed requesting an estimated time of arrival. I am on the case. Simmering just below tetchy.)
'It'll be useful for banging other stuff into the ground at the allotment,' says Andy, because he really wants his own sledgehammer.
'Like what?' I say.
'Stuff,' says Andy.

So we buy a sledgehammer.

Andy is out in the garden, now. There is much to-ing and fro-ing, measuring and thumping, and I could have sworn I saw a chicken ricocheting across the garden a few moments ago but Andy reassures me it was a plastic flower pot. I have been called to the garden once in order to give my opinion on the inclusion or the exclusion of the eucalyptus into the Chicken Run, Part 2. We decide to include the tree as the hens use it as a preening canopy when it is raining.

And I am sure every one will be thrilled to know that Mrs Miggins' raised bed is growing some lovely radish and lettuce. Not in the neat rows I initially planted. Oh no. The effect is more 'random', more 'abstract.' Like a wild life garden. Miggo assures me this style is a typical hen-style of gardening, tried and tested for centuries, even when chickens were velociraptors. I asked her about the practicalities of thinning out the seedlings, given their random growing positions.

She told me to go away.