Diversionary tactics and champagne confessions

We shall not, it transpires, be coming home from Stratford via Lincoln. It seems, after studying the map and inputting details into the lovely AA Routefinder, that they are too far apart to qualify as an bona fide detour. Now, some might say that if we really wanted to move to Lincolnshire because of the cheap(er) houses with big gardens, we would make the effort and do our detour, no matter HOW LONG it took.

And you would be right. And I am not going to argue with you. I shall chastise myself for my rampant Sunday inertia and then have the fish finger sandwich I have been looking forward too all morning.

Yesterday, more bottles of elderflower champagne popped their corks, one in a most spectacular fashion, which I suppose is the purpose of champagne. The best one was when Andy tried to open a bottle that had actually managed to maintain its cork 'n' cage combo. He brought it into the kitchen and somehow the contents managed to spray themselves all over the floor, cupboards and worktops, leaving about half a glass worth's for actual drinking.

'I'll open another but in the garden this time,' said Andy and I rushed after him to record the results with my camera. It was highly entertaining!

'Never mind,' I said to Andy, because he was looking a little sad that the champagne experiment hadn't been a huge success. 'It's all a learning experience. And the elderflowers are turning into berries. You can make some elderflower wine in a few weeks. I think that will be a safer proposition all around, don't you?'
'I don't understand why the champagne developed so much gas,' said Andy. 'I didn't think I put THAT much yeast in.'
'Did you follow the recipe?' I said.
Andy looks a bit sheepish.
'Ish,' he said.
'Meaning?' I said.
'Meaning that the recipe said if the elderflower hadn't started fermenting naturally after two days, then to add 'a bit of yeast.' It didn't exactly specify HOW much yeast, so I just chucked in what I thought.'
'Ah,' I said. 'I think I see now.'

This morning, we gave the car its annual valeting. I say valeting, but what I really mean is squirting a bit of window cleaner around, throwing a bit of polish at it and waving the crevice nozzle between the seats and in the awkward spaces in the boot. And then we nipped to Sainsbugs to get a bit of shopping so Heather doesn't starve whilst we are away for a day. And this afternoon we are going to the allotment to water and install the latest in must-have polytunnel equipment - 'The Big Drippa!'

The Big Drippa arrived yesterday in a disappointingly small parcel, but then you do have to add your own water which is where the 'Big' in the name comes into the equation. The Big Drippa is basically a large bag with reams of tubing attached. You hang your Big Drippa in your polytunnel and fill it with water, and then you arrange your tubing artistically amongst your plants and the Big Drippa will drip water your plants for you over a 24 hour period, thus being ideal should one want to go away for a day or two in a heat wave

My own home made watering equipment i.e the cut off tops of squash bottles inverted into the soil and filled with water, have been working remarkably well as slow watering reservoirs. I was a bit dubious about their effectiveness at first, but given we've had a lovely sunny week, I've had to go to the allotment for watering only twice in five days, which is good as it takes me half an hour to walk to the allotment and half an hour to walk back, so isn't one of my favourite activities. I think my system, coupled with the Big Drippa will provide our polytunnel plants with all their watering needs very nicely indeed.

And this evening, Andy and I are sitting down and planning a timetable for his week's holiday. He doesn't know this yet, but I think it would be a good idea in order to avoid excessive sitting around and staring. He has already expressed a desire to make handmade River Cottage bread this week, and go to Greenwich to the Planetarium. The last time we went to Greenwich, our friend Jean took us in the back of her vintage Rolls Royce which was very showbiz and exciting!
I'd quite like to go to Kew or Hampton Court Palace but anywhere I can pretend I am a Tudor queen would be good.